10 Sexiest Female Cartoon Characters

10. Red Hot Riding Hood: Droopy cartoons

She may have been the first animated woman to give men wood. Her movements were so perfect & sexy that many people thought it was an actual woman who was roto-scoped (animation was drawn over the actual film), but she wasn't. As a kid, I could care less. But as a man, I now know why the wolf went crazy for her.

9. Harley Quinn: Batman TAS

Clowns scare some people. But even those people take one look at Harley & melt. Nothing sexier than a girl wearing a full body spandex outfit. Her voice is of a dumb blonde, but she's not as dumb as she seems. Well, her boyfriend is the Joker, so maybe I spoke too soon. In any case, she's one mean bitch, but then again, who isn't?

8. Jun (Aka Princess from "Battle of the Planets"): Gatchaman

My first glimpse of anime women came in the form of a woman dressed as a bird. She had a very slender athletic build & a small chest. But she also had those "fuck-me" crotch high boots. Her eyes were gorgeously huge & she could kick ass too.

7. Baroness: G.I. Joe

Sure, she was the bad guy, but I would let her tie me up any day. Baroness had a sexy Russian accent too, which made you think she knew what to do in bed. Plus, those glasses were so damn sexy. Her body was knock-out perfect & her skin-tight outfit hugged every inch of it.

6. Elasti-Girl: The Incredibles

She could stretch her body into any form you wanted. But even in her "relaxed" state, she had a nice round ass & a waist so thin, you could wrap your hands around it.

5. Dr. Girlfriend: The Venture Brothers

Alright, look at the picture. Now picture that hot girl with the hot body to have a man's voice. And I mean a man who not only sounds like he smoked 10 packs of cigarettes a day, but ate the butts too. I don't know how, but it works. She's damn sexy.

4. Cheetara: Thundercats

She's the ultimate Catwoman, because she's a cat. She has the body of an athlete, but with a nice rack to boot. She was also an expert fighter & able to hold her own against the biggest male adversaries.

3. Josie & the Pussycats: Josie & the Pussycats (& Josie in Outer Space)

More cats. Yes, cats are sexy. Or at least when girls dress as cats, they are. We waited years to see real girls dress in these cat outfits. And when they finally make a live-action film, they don't wear the outfits. Stupid fucks in Hollywood. In any case, Melody is the one to fuck first....and forth....and seventh.

2. Priss: Bubblegum Crisis / Bubblegum Crash

Priss is a popular singer. Think of her having Madonna's popularity, but actually having the talent to sing too. By night, she's a member of the vigilante team, the Knight Sabers. She wears this outfit

for a few reasons:
1) To disguise herself
2) The suit enhances her body, giving her strength & agility
3) It protects her
4) It has weapons
5) Because it's sexy
I like the last reason best.

1. Jessica Rabbit: Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Do I even have to comment here? She was made to be the sexiest cartoon character. They based her a bit on Red Hot Riding Hood & then just made her amazing. I have a friend who admits to masturbating over her. Sure, he's now in a mental institution, but that doesn't mean anything. Right?

The 10 Best Cartoon Bad Guys of All Time.

10. Boris Badenov - The Rocky & Bullwinkle Show

Shaddup you mouth!

Never in the history of cartoons has there been a character so happy to be evil than Boris Badenov. Along with his sidekick, the almost as evil (and somehow strangely sexy), Natasha Fatale, Boris did everything he could to make Moose & Squirrel's life a living hell. He obviously hated America & everything to do with it. But, he also hated his own country of Pottsylvania & did his best to avoid going there whenever possible.

9. Berg Katse - Gatchaman

The original sex change artist

Also known as Zoltar in "Battle of the Planets" & Galactor in "G-Force".
Berg Katse is the leader of Galactor (that was the name of the organization in the original version), an evil alien race, determined to rule the Earth. What set Berg apart from the other alien bad guys, is he was a shape-shifting sex-changer. Yes, sometimes he was a man & sometimes he was a woman! The English versions explain this by saying it was two different people, Zoltar & his sister. Although, even as I kid, I figured out they were one & the same. Although I thought he was just a woman, dressed like a man. Little did I know what screwy heads the Japanese had with their characters. Considering Berg had to deal with the fact that sometimes he had a cock & sometimes not, I have to give him credit that he was able to do as well as he did running the whole show.

8. Cobra Commander - G.I. Joe

COBRA!

Cobra Commander is leader of Cobra, a ruthless terrorist organization, determined to rule the world! Kind of like Galactor, but Earthbound. And Cobra's ideas to take over the world were so crazy, that aliens from another world were like, "That's some crazy shit, Cobra!" He always hid his face, either behind a hood, with eye holes, or a helmet with a mirrored front. Somehow, this mirrored face didn't reflect anything. It was Cobra Commander's voice that was the star of the show though. It was raspy & lispy & when he spoke, you listened. Cobra Commander was such a great character, that he even appeared in another cartoon, "The Transformers", which obviously took place years after Cobra was disbanded, as he was pretty much alone. As far as we know, Cobra Commander is still out there, biding his time. Mwahaha! COBRA!

7. General Grievous - Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Kick ass cyborg!

Appearing in the 2nd "season" of the animated Star Wars tale, that takes place between Episodes 2 & 3, Grievous stood out as one mean mother fucker. He killed almost all the Jedi, BY HIMSELF! He stood taller than the Jedis & had 4 arms, which meant, 4 fucking light sabers! He was so cool, that George Lucas said, "He's cooler than any character I ever came up with. Let's put him in the next movie!" Of course, Lucas turned him into a smaller Cyborg with an exposed heart, which was easily shot by a blaster. But, for a small shining moment, in the animated series, Grievous kicked so much alien ass, that Galactor was looking to hire him.

6. The Legion of Doom - Superfriends

It's almost like they know the camera is in the room!

Yes, I know this is a team of Super-villains, but they moved as one. Actually, they pretty much never moved as one. But, that didn't matter either. The LoD had a much cooler HQ than the Superfriends ever had. Their HQ would rise up out of a swamp. And inside, it was just a table that fit all members of the LoD. Their leader was Lex Luthor, the mastermind. They also had Bizarro, Black Manta, Riddler, Giganta, Sinestro, Cheetah, Solomon Grundy, the Scarecrow, Brainiac, Captain Cold, Gorilla Grodd, & the Toyman. Alone, these bad guys kind of sucked, but together....Watch out!!! Actually, they kind of sucked together too. But the name, the name!!! Legion of DOOOOOOM!!!

5. Dishonest John - Beany & Cecil

NYA HA HA!

You know why Dishonest John deserves to be on this list? Because his name was Dishonest John & he was still able to con people (and sea serpents). He had the word "dishonest" sitting there for all to see. But it didn't matter! Nya Ha Ha!!

4. Megatron - The Transformers

Hey Starscream! Wax my ass!

If you could put evil into a robot & then boost up the evil to 11, that was Megatron. He could give two shits about human life. He was all about getting energy & didn't care who or what was in his way. He even treated his own soldiers like shit. He also transformed into the stupidest form, a gun, that only worked if someone shot it for him. It didn't matter. They were all scared of him, the good, the bad, didn't matter. Megatron was Megacool!

3. Bluto - Popeye cartoons

This big mumbling fool was all muscle. It seemed Bluto was only there for one reason, to cock-block Popeye into nailing Olive. And it worked too, because Popeye & Olive never did it. Bluto didn't need any spinach to kick the shit out of Popeye either. He could walk through walls, bend steel bars with his teeth, & toss Popeye a block away. He shaved with a razor so nicked, that a normal man would have bled to death using it on his face. And when he shaved, he had a full beard. The only questionable thing was why was he such a prick to Popeye? Bah, no matter! Bluto is one mean sumamabitch!

2. Joker - Batman: The Animated Series

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

The Clown Prince of Crime! Never mind the Calypso Joker from the 60s, or even the smeary faced dude from the new Batman movie, the Joker from Batman: TAS has them all beat. He is truly maniacal & crazy. Just see him interact with his one true "love" Harley Quinn. He could care less about her, or does he? His plans are diabolical & over-the-top! He's scary, funny, & evil to the core.

1. Venger - Dungeons & Dragons

The Force of Evil!

Talk about evil. This guy wants to kill kids! His father is Dungeon Master, the creator of the Realm of Dungeons & Dragons. Does Venger care? Fuck no! Dungeon Master protects the kids. Does Venger care? Fuck no! The only thing Venger is scared of is a 3 headed dragon, that is about 90 feet tall. It's the only thing that scares him! And I bet even that never made Venger shit his pants. All the kids wanted to do was get back home, but Venger said, "No way little fucks!" and ruined their chances time & time again. Fucking with kids is evil to the core & that's all Venger did. He is truly the champ of cartoon bad guys.

The Dark Dud

Before I give my review of the super-blockbuster super-hyped new Batman movie, I'm going to repost my thoughts about the new movie, based on the trailers I saw. And from what I saw, I was pretty damn close.

There is another Batman movie coming out soon. The villain of the movie is played by the recently deceased Heath Ledger. Ledger was a good actor & I'm sure he did his best in the role. Unfortunately, the movie looks like utter crap. I wonder if these movie people have ever read a Batman comic. I see cockney Alfred is back, as is the shit Batmotank. We now have a new Bat Motorcycle, which looks like the shit-box tank, cut in half. Now for all I know, this movie may be good. But I'm sure it won't make my dream of bringing a good Batman movie to the screen a reality. The Joker looks like a guy who is wearing make-up & is sweating it off, rather than the chemically scarred person he's supposed to be. And from what I see in the trailers, it looks like a lot of talk, a lot of Bruce Wayne & just a smidgen of kick-ass action. I hope I'm proven wrong. But this Dark Knight looks like a Dark Dud.

I was right about the motor-cycle being half of the tank & I was right about the Joker just being some thug with make-up. I was also right that they still haven't made a good Batman movie. But anyway...

My review.

Just got back from The Dark Knight & unfortunately, I was right. This movie was no worse than the last one, but no better either. In fact, it was mostly a fucking bore, just like the last one.

The movie starts with a bank robbery by the Joker. He shoots all his accomplices. Ooh, never seen that before. We then see his face. YAWN. He then speaks. He is neither scary nor threatening. In fact, no body in the movie seems to be scared of him either, something the Joker could do in the comics with just his face. This one just looks like a stupid guy in makeup. I guess they wanted to go the real route in this comic book movie, because he would not scare anyone in real life either. As for Ledger, he was very good. But, there is nothing I saw in Ledger's performance to may me say, "Wow!" or "He deserves an award." He is so unlike the Joker, or any super villain for that matter, that he comes across as just a common street thug. His performance is over-rated & I hate to say it, but it's because the fool killed himself. The Joker is supposed to be the Clown Prince of Crime. Instead he's just another guy who likes to kill for fun. Something I've seen 1000 times before. I never felt like he had the presence of the Joker. Not once did I ever feel he could run a big crime syndicate or even a small group of punks.

We then see the horrendous Scarecrow rendition from the last movie & shows us how stupid of a character they made last time around.
The movie is drawn out over 2 & a half hours. They have very little character development & as a result, I don't care for either Harvey Dent or the ugly broad they threw in this movie. Would two super rich, super powerful men go after her? Not a shot in hell. Stupid.

Luckily Michael Cane is in the movie for about 3 minutes total, so it didn't even bother me that it was supposed to be Alfred this time. I just thought of him as an old English homosexual, living with the lisping Bruce Wayne. Speaking of Bruce Wayne, Christian Bale is a good Bruce Wayne. But his stupid voice as Batman is so corny, that Adam West is groaning somewhere.

There were some good parts of the movie. I liked the Batcycle, although if it weren't for CGI, that thing wouldn't be able to turn left on a 4 lane stretch of road.
Another thing I liked is that they finally addressed how stupid it was that Batman couldn't turn his head. They lightened up the armor (something Batman shouldn't be using in the first place) & gave him a neck. Hooray! The car chase scene was pretty good, not great. I do also have to mention that Gary Oldman was the best as Jim Gordon. Morgan Freeman, is also great & he's given a bigger part, which he deserved.

My friend kept telling me that the Batman I want is the kiddie Batman & this one is the adult Batman because it's more realistic. Bullshit, I want the comic book Batman. I want the animated series Batman. I tried to imagine if this were real life & the movie were not based on a comic book. And when I did that, I saw how truly boring the movie was. If being adult means boring, then this film was definitely adult. I'll stick to something that can entertain. I'm still waiting for a good Batman movie.

If this scares you, you're a wuss.